Believe me, I really wished I could have just woken up and that everything I had been dealing with was all a bad dream.
This incident happened to me in July of 2010. My doctors had me on 11 prescription medications and I was somewhat sedated... asleep you could say.
(The whole story is in my two memoirs: Appearances: A Journey of Self-Discovery and Love, Life, & God: Getting Past the Pain.)
You see, once upon a time, I was overwhelmed by Depression, Anxiety, PTSD from multiple incidents of trauma, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (Epstein Barr Virus), and Adrenal Burnout plus the pain of Fibromyalgia, Arthritis, Facet Syndrome, Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, and Polycystic Ovarian Disease--leading up to permanent disability in 1998.
When I could no longer work, I lost the identity connected to the work I did. Then my identity became the afflictions I had, including being a "disabled person." Despite antidepressants, I dealt with an increasing amount of stress, anxiety, depression, struggle, and low self-worth.
In July 2010, the transformation began after I met a psychic intuitive who told me,
As a result of this encounter, I decided to stop taking the 11 prescription medications I swallowed every day cold turkey. (Please don't do this!)
For the 1st 24 hours, I was OK and thought nothing would happen. Then the withdrawal hit. For 5 days, I was terribly sick. I had the sweats, chills, diarrhea, and felt like I had the severe case of the flu.
Then I WOKE UP!
I felt like I was injected with adrenaline! And, I thought I had experienced a miraculous cure!
I went from spending ¾ of my life in bed to experiencing strength, energy, and absence of pain as well as inability to sleep more than 2 hours a night. This adrenaline rush lasted for 3 months, during which time I seemed to be downloaded from the heavens with a life purpose--to USE THE TALENTS I HAD BEEN BORN WITH.
I started writing non-stop, all of which became this blog and the many books I’ve published so far.
A few months after 'waking up,' I swung the other way and crashed. The pain and weakness returned, and I became severely depressed. A recovering alcoholic said I "hit the wall." (Years later, I realized it was Adrenal Burnout.)
All my Primary Physician had to offer was more prescription medication, which I sadly accepted because I couldn't afford to see a Naturopathic Doctor or get any of the alternative therapies I wanted.
But I had to know... what happened during the 3 months I felt fantastic? And could I feel that way again?
At the library, I found a book about women's health issues and realized that one of the 'drugs' I had been taking was Premarin because my ovaries were removed and I had spun into severe menopause. The non-stop sweats followed by chills each and every day for a year were really long hot flashes!
I continued to do more research to try and figure out what had happened while building this blog, adding links to all the blogs & websites I found pertaining to my challenges.
My thirst for learning more about my body and natural solutions intensified and the internet began to deliver one documentary series after another pertaining to autoimmune disease, vaccines, thyroid issues, adrenal issues, and alternative treatments for chronic pain. I listened to interviews with holistic doctors and practitioners from all over the world.
I learned about nutrition (healing leaky gut & improving autoimmune issues) and lots of positive psychology (your thoughts create your life).
I learned Conventional Medicine (the route I had taken for my issues) is generally for managing diseases and disabilities once you develop them. As for me…
- There was never any mention I could have gluten intolerance and other food sensitivities that were triggering autoimmune responses which targeted my muscles, ligaments, and tendons.
- There was never any mention, I could have a leaky gut from all the antibiotics I had been given which were also triggering autoimmune reactions.
- There was never any mention that my thought processes were distorted.
- And there certainly was never any mention that by focusing on everything that was wrong, including my life circumstances and ailments, I was attracting more of it.
Energy Medicine, however, returns homeostasis and BALANCE vs. DIS-EASE as well as providing COURAGE and HOPE. I found a new highway to achieving health and happiness, even putting away my wheelchair after depending on one for over five years.
I learned that patterns of thinking and believing produce chemical reactions in your body, which affect your nervous system, digestive system, endocrine system, hormone production, energy level, and your balance... all of which immediately and directly impact your immune system.
I learned about the Law of Attraction and realized how by focusing on all that was wrong with my life, I attracted more of the same.
Once I began to focus on GRATITUDE, MIRACLES, and SYNCHRONICITY, I began to attract this instead, including alternative health care practitioners who offered treatment and solutions in exchange for what I had taught myself how to do--publishing and website creation.
I learned about the 10 Cognitive Distortions (10 Forms of Twisted Thinking)--and acknowledged I had all 10 of them, which contributed to unhappiness, pain, and depression.
- I kept track of my thoughts.
- I matched them to a cognitive distortion.
- Were the thoughts I was thinking true? Well, no.
- Did I have PROOF they were true? No again.
In July 2015, I joined Killeen Toastmasters with the hope of developing self-confidence in speaking and was pleasantly surprised when I began to develop communication, teamwork, and leadership skills, too.
Listening to inspirational speeches on a weekly basis keeps me inspired! So many people have managed to transform their lives despite their disabilities and/or childhood abuse/trauma or PTSD from being in the military.
In 2016, I received Certifications in Basic & Advanced DNA Theta Healing® to add to previous Reiki Certifications. The belief work included techniques for digging for core subconscious beliefs.
What were mine?
- I had to be in pain in order to exist!
- I had to be perfect in order to be loved--and because I wasn't perfect, I was unlovable.
- that in order to utilize the Law of Attraction, you have to love yourself enough to believe you DESERVE to have what you desire?
- that you will attract people in your life who REFLECT your lack of self-love issues?
- that you cannot love others as you love yourself if your idea of love is DISTORTED?
The neural pathways you've been creating in your brain from childhood can be smoothed away and new ones created, just like you close an old worn out road and build a new one.
Indeed, my readers, when I figured it all out, my life shifted dramatically! Amazing people and circumstances began to manifest all around me, including the transfer to a newly remodeled apartment!
I still have Arthritis & Fibromyalgia (although not nearly as severe as it used to be), but having a PURPOSE enables me to cope with it and living in JOY works better than taking pain pills.
Yes, I discovered (or rediscovered) my passion for sharing and making a difference.
Having my Toastmasters group continuously prods me to develop who I am as a person which spills over into every other aspect of my life.
Having a supportive doTerra “Tribe” gives me the means for continuous, mutually supportive health and wellness.
On this site, I have provided links to meditations, exercises, and websites that were instrumental in my transformation. Come inside... and find some inspiring solutions for your life!
I am eager and willing to inspire personal transformation for you just as it has happened for me.
There are many more 'albums' on my Pinterest Page.
I also post on the Lampasas Pain Support Facebook Group so be sure to request to join the group.
Be forewarned, though. Too much time on your computer, tablet, or smartphone will aggravate your condition and repetitive motion injuries are painful! Looking down at devices continuously messes with your neck and all the way down as you lose the natural curve in it.
Meanwhile, I learned how to format and publish my own books for paperback and Kindle (including cover design) for Amazon. Now I am ready to help YOU publish one of yours.
Today, I am well, happier, healthier, and stronger than I've ever been before or thought I could ever achieve.
Hope is knowing that just because everything you tried in the past hasn't worked, it doesn't mean there isn't anything new still to be discovered!